Binary number tattoo

i'll teach you to turn away. schrieb:
> LC <LC@fakemail.com> wrote:
> L> I can't speculate on how you understood what I wrote or how
> L> it applies to you personally. I can only say it confuses me
> L> when people do things that seem meant to gain attention to
> L> the unknowing bystander then get angry when attention is
>
> sometimes, the garnering of attention is an unwanted but
> unavoidable side effect of doing something to yourself that makes you
> happy. thing is, when you do something to yourself that can be
> publically seen, even when it's truly just for you, you have to accept
> that it's GOING to garner that attention. while it's not a requirement in
> any way that you respond to the interested parties with the information
> they seek, you DO need to have a polite way to respond that doesn't
> further our own stereotype. "thank you, but i don't discuss the meanings
> with strangers" works fine for me.


That sounds like a good one to me too. I'm moving house and
have to get my own prepared. I expect the people I
encounter when I'm interviewing for a new place will have
questions. I also expect prejudice but personal freedom is
worth it.

On Tue, 11 Jul 2006 23:31:17 +0200, LC <LC@fakemail.com>wrote:

>N Jill Marsh schrieb:
>
>> On Sat, 08 Jul 2006 23:26:29 +0200, LC <LC@fakemail.com>wrote:
>>
>>> They complain they've even been pressed to tell which one
>>> carried the baby and this is an unforgivable encroachment on
>>> their privacy.
>>
>> And it is. That's extremely rude.
>
>You really think so? If I were out with my son and someone
>asked if I were his biological mother I'd say "yes" and
>think nothing of it. I can't imagine why that would be
>offensive.

Aside from the fact it's overly personal from a stranger, it has ugly
connotations of "which one of you is the 'real' mother because one of
you dykes isn't".

Would you find it rude if a stranger approached, cooed over the baby
and then after you told them you were the baby's mother they went on
to press you to confirm that you had actually conceived, carried,
delivered and thus were the biological, the 'real' mother rather than
just 'the mother' as you told them? How about someone asking a hetero
couple if they acquired their lovely baby by having sex with each
other or did they adopt?

>I don't know why this should come up now but lately it's
>been a real issue for me. I've even ordered a book on
>manners and how to handle these situations gracefully and
>I'm eager to hear what it advises.

I love Miss Manners. I don't always agree with her, but she's
entertaining and educational reading - this is a plug.

>> Of the two 'innocent' questions I am asked most often, the majority of
>> people won't pursue the topic after "I like them"
>
>As in you saying you like them?

"Why do you have so many ....?"

"Why did you....?"

"What on earth caused you to...?"

nj"and variations thereof"m

--
"See, here he comes stealing through the undergrowth, his face shining with the light of
pure intelligence. There are no limits to Jeeve's brain power. He virtually lives on fish."

LC <LC@fakemail.com> wrote:
L> That sounds like a good one to me too. I'm moving house and
L> have to get my own prepared. I expect the people I
L> encounter when I'm interviewing for a new place will have
L> questions. I also expect prejudice but personal freedom is
L> worth it.

that's best put by shannon larratt of bmezine.com:

"Public body modification can force you to trade one life for another -
it's very rare to be able to have it all (but it can happen with effort).
Looking like yourself will force you to work much, much harder than
people who all look the same. Being free requires a lot more work than
being a slave. Running your own business is more effort than working for
someone else. Being an actor is more difficult than watching a movie.
Cooking a meal is more difficult than buying a cheeseburger at a fast
food joint... But, there are still people left in this world who believe
that sometimes the difficult - but free - path is the more rewarding.

"The fundamental question in becoming publicly modified is a question of
finding a balance between how free you want to be and how hard you want to
work. The more free you are, the more responsibility you have to take for
yourself. The more you blend back into the crowd, the less freedom you
have, but the 'easier' your life gets. But is it really your life if
you're not controlling it?"

that said, offer to hide what you can if they look at you funny.
a little clear retainer or a long-sleeved shirt might be the difference
between landing the job & being passed over for a mundie.

lish "do you think you can forget anything?
crank@got.net i am the saint of indecency." -jc
43.9% / 30 RANA 125 / 68

N Jill Marsh schrieb:
> On Tue, 11 Jul 2006 23:31:17 +0200, LC <LC@fakemail.com>wrote:
>> N Jill Marsh schrieb:
>>> On Sat, 08 Jul 2006 23:26:29 +0200, LC <LC@fakemail.com>wrote:
>>>
>>>> They complain they've even been pressed to tell which one
>>>> carried the baby and this is an unforgivable encroachment on
>>>> their privacy.
>>> And it is. That's extremely rude.
>> You really think so? If I were out with my son and someone
>> asked if I were his biological mother I'd say "yes" and
>> think nothing of it. I can't imagine why that would be
>> offensive.
>
> Aside from the fact it's overly personal from a stranger, it has ugly
> connotations of "which one of you is the 'real' mother because one of
> you dykes isn't".
>
> Would you find it rude if a stranger approached, cooed over the baby
> and then after you told them you were the baby's mother they went on
> to press you to confirm that you had actually conceived, carried,
> delivered and thus were the biological, the 'real' mother rather than
> just 'the mother' as you told them?


No.


> How about someone asking a hetero
> couple if they acquired their lovely baby by having sex with each
> other or did they adopt?


I would find that strange. Probably too strange to consider
it invasive until the moment had passed. When it happened
I'd most likely be too busy laughing at the question to be
upset. If I did have my wits about me enough to consider it
I'd most likely answer it with another question: Why are
you so interested? Hopefully this would alert the person
they're venturing too far into area that isn't their business.

With your explanation and this question I can see now why
the lesbian couple (whose lifestyle isn't strange to them
but may be to others) would consider that invasive.


>> I don't know why this should come up now but lately it's
>> been a real issue for me. I've even ordered a book on
>> manners and how to handle these situations gracefully and
>> I'm eager to hear what it advises.
>
> I love Miss Manners. I don't always agree with her, but she's
> entertaining and educational reading - this is a plug.


Good! I wondered if I'd like the books. They're all
getting good reviews.


>>> Of the two 'innocent' questions I am asked most often, the majority of
>>> people won't pursue the topic after "I like them"
>> As in you saying you like them?
>
> "Why do you have so many ....?"
>
> "Why did you....?"
>
> "What on earth caused you to...?"
>
> nj"and variations thereof"m


I see. I've gotten a couple looks of the "What on earth"
variety. So far I'm ignoring it.

i'll teach you to turn away. schrieb:
> LC <LC@fakemail.com> wrote:
> L> That sounds like a good one to me too. I'm moving house and
> L> have to get my own prepared. I expect the people I
> L> encounter when I'm interviewing for a new place will have
> L> questions. I also expect prejudice but personal freedom is
> L> worth it.
>
> that's best put by shannon larratt of bmezine.com:
>
> "Public body modification can force you to trade one life for another -


Yes, that's exactly what it feels like I've done.


> it's very rare to be able to have it all (but it can happen with effort).


For me there's no going back, no having it all. I doubt I'm
that talented. How and whatever, I've made a choice I'm
satisfied with and I'm going to live with it.


> Looking like yourself will force you to work much, much harder than
> people who all look the same. Being free requires a lot more work than
> being a slave. Running your own business is more effort than working for
> someone else. Being an actor is more difficult than watching a movie.
> Cooking a meal is more difficult than buying a cheeseburger at a fast
> food joint... But, there are still people left in this world who believe
> that sometimes the difficult - but free - path is the more rewarding.
>
> "The fundamental question in becoming publicly modified is a question of
> finding a balance between how free you want to be and how hard you want to
> work. The more free you are, the more responsibility you have to take for
> yourself. The more you blend back into the crowd, the less freedom you
> have, but the 'easier' your life gets. But is it really your life if
> you're not controlling it?"


Well said and amen.